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Moscow Hosts Afghanistan Intervention Alumni Reunion, Everyone Now Against Foreign Interference

Lavrov, Pakistan and the Taliban agreed Afghanistan must never again become a playground for foreign powers without consulting the previous players.

Moscow Hosts Afghanistan Intervention Alumni Reunion, Everyone Now Against Foreign Interference
Moscow hosted an Afghanistan intervention alumni reunion. Russia discovered sovereignty after withdrawing, Pakistan discovered non-interference after losing influence, and Khalilzad reminded Afghans to decide their own future once everyone else finishes.

MOSCOW—Sergey Lavrov opened the Moscow Format by welcoming Afghanistan’s neighbors to what organizers described as the region’s first intervention alumni reunion.

Russia urged countries to respect Afghan sovereignty, citing Moscow’s extensive experience discovering it shortly after withdrawing its last Soviet soldier.

Pakistan’s Mohammad Sadiq agreed, warning against foreign interference in Afghanistan. Delegates applauded Islamabad’s transition from practitioner to subject-matter expert.

The Taliban thanked both countries. Amir Khan Muttaqi said Afghanistan would never again accept instructions from foreign powers, particularly now that the foreign powers which helped his movement reach Kabul had begun giving instructions he disliked.

Lavrov then asked everyone to identify lessons from forty years of war. Pakistan blamed Afghanistan, Russia blamed America, the Taliban blamed the Republic, and America blamed its calendar.

Ambassador Ashraf Haidari joined remotely to insist Afghans must determine their own future. Moscow agreed, Pakistan seconded the motion, Iran proposed amendments, China requested guarantees, and the Taliban reserved final approval.

Mohammad Sadiq froze at the name Ashraf, briefly mistaking Haidari for Ghani.

The summit ended by declaring Afghanistan must never again become a battlefield for great-power rivalry.

Lavrov closed the meeting, Pakistan collected the minutes, and Americans asked why nobody had invited the Afghans they were replacing.

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